4:30 am

by uzwi

I went out into the corridor where it was cooler and looked out over a strip of grass and some bollards. An iron staircase was off to one side. Everything was lighted grey and blue. I could see what I thought was a car park and behind that a few trees quite dense and dark against the sky. White propane tanks. Some kind of portabuilding offices. I had a short complete glimpse of myself opening the fire door and walking away. I felt as if I could easily have gone back down the institutional corridor, collected my credit cards and cash and whatever personal belongings I had brought in with me, and walked away. It wouldn’t have required a decision. To some degree, in fact, I felt that it had already happened. That initial glimpse had lobed itself off and become its own world in which I could see myself moving away between the trees, tentatively at first but with increasing confidence. I didn’t need to go because I had gone. So I went back to bed